girls just wanna have fun

(one of the top 5 movies of all time)

A friend of mine from work is having a dinner party this weekend.  It's a "no boys allowed" dinner party.  Which, for most people, means they can't bring their significant other. 

Part of the reason that girls want the girls night is just that the dynamic of the group is different when it's just one sex.  The conversation can be very different.  But, on the other hand, part of the reason that girls have the girls' night out is that the dynamic of the group is different when no one's other half is there.  It's hard for me to complain about my relationship when she's sitting right next to me.

So, when it comes to the girls' night out, we are always stuck in the middle.  On the one hand, we are, in fact, both girls.  But on the other hand, we are, in fact, in a relationship.  So whenever girls' night out comes up (or girls' night in, in the case of a dinner party) we always have to sit down and try to figure out which kind of girls' night out it actually is.  This involves a complicated, multi-factor test.

love shack, part II

Last night, I was putting photos into the photo album.  I don't know why this was an urgent holiday task, but it suddenly felt like it was, so while Kathy sat there writing out the last of our holiday cards, I put pictures in the album.  I like printed out photos, and I like them arranged in books, rather than just in shoeboxes.  I think they're so much easier for people to look at that way.

The majority of the pictures that I was putting into the album last night were pictures from this past summer, and the majority of those were pictures from our Fire Island "house."  As you will recall, we can't really afford it if I quit working at the firm.  Even if I don't quit right away, with quitting on the horizon, there are probably a million smarter things to do with the money.  But still.

Kathy mentioned when I brought up the idea of letting go of the house how much the kids enjoyed it.  It's true, they did.  Looking back at the pictures, we had so much fun!  There are pictures of the things that I remember doing as a kid, when I visited my grandma's house on Saginaw Bay.  Like playing Uncle Wiggily and having "happy time" (aka happy hour, through the filter of a 9 year old brain).  Or exploring the beach and imagining drift wood is a sunken pirate ship.  I do think that is one of the best things about having kids in your life -- it makes you remember your own childhood, and all of it's adventures, misery, joy, and wonder.

ghosts

This weekend, my computer crashed.  Because of how I downloaded a virus onto it trying to watch a Scottish lesbian BBC series.  Yeah, I know.  So embarrassing.  Of course it crashed exactly when I was sitting down to work, so I used the desktop while distractedly clicking at my laptop trying to get it to work.  I'm not horrible with computers, but I'm not great, either.  It got itself all into a tangle and now Windows won't start.  Sigh.  This is why people use Macs, I suppose.  Or at least don't use Internet Explorer.  Anyway, this crashing was the genesis of a larger feeling of uneasiness when I realized that there was something completely irreplaceable and of indeterminate value on the hard drive.  My wedding pictures.

Yes, I was married before.  It's something no one knows how to talk about with me.  Whenever I mention my ex-wife, people try to change the subject or talk about her like she was my best friend who moved away or something.  The thing is, no one knows what to do with someone who is 29 years old and divorced.  But if you think that's bad, try being 29 years old and GAY divorced.  If same-sex marriage is a taboo topic, try same-sex divorce.  So far I have met one person in my entire life who can talk about same-sex divorce comfortably.  And she's a divorce attorney.

Photo Credit.